Living With Autism:
A Parent’s Guide

Reading Time: 9 minutes

The day you welcomed your baby girl or boy into this world was possibly one of the happiest and most exciting days of your life. Staring down at this perfect little being in your arms, ten fingers and ten toes, you probably imagined all the wonderful things they’re going to do.

You might have downloaded a developmental app on your phone so that you can chart every milestone they reach. But as the weeks and months go by, you start noticing that they’re not progressing quite like the chart.

Some people tell you not to worry. Every child achieves at different times. But then your little one doesn’t seem to engage with the world around them. They struggle to sit or crawl, and they react badly to certain sounds and smells.

There is a voice in the back of your head saying something is different. Listen to that voice, because it could mean an early diagnosis, and an opportunity to support your child to develop optimally, as soon as possible.

It can be incredibly stressful and emotionally draining to raise a child with autism. The demands are significant, and this puts a strain on parents, their other children, and relationships.

That is why early detection is crucial to giving your child the best start in life, and your family the knowledge and means to cope, and thrive despite the challenges you face.

If you think your child may be autistic, get in touch with your General Practitioner or Welwitschia Hospital (email: hello@welwitschiahospital.com) to book an appointment.

But first, let’s take a look at the facts. Use the quick links to jump ahead

What is autism?
What are the signs and symptoms of an autistic child?
What may cause autism?
Why is early intervention essential?
How early can you diagnose autism?
What treatments are available for autism?
Living with autism? Do these six things
Can your autistic child lead a good life?
When should you see a doctor?

What is autism?

Autism is a lifelong neurobiological developmental disorder that is characterised by challenges with social skills, repetitive behaviours, speech, and nonverbal communication, as well as unique strengths and differences. While people with autism look no different from you or me, they have significant differences in how their brains function.

Firstly, autistic children learn in vastly different ways than most other children. They think and interact differently. They also approach problem-solving differently. And their abilities can range from highly intelligent and independent to severely challenged.

While we don’t know what causes autism, we do know that early intervention ensures a child receives the support they need to lead a quality life.

What are the signs and symptoms of an autistic child?

There’s something to be said about a parent’s gut feeling. You spend the most time with your child, and you need to trust yourself if you feel that something is off.

Like many new parents, you’ve probably signed up to a developmental milestone tracker, and each month, you’ll chart your little one’s progress. These apps tell you when your child should be sitting, crawling, rolling over, walking, grasping objects, smiling, talking. You get the idea.

Some children achieve milestones early. Some are delayed by one or two months. But if your child consistently misses developmental milestones or seems to regress or lose the ability to maintain a previously achieved milestone, it might be time to get a medical opinion.

Just a note that premature babies are always playing catch up on the time they missed out in the womb, so they tend to be a little behind on the developmental charts.

To help you make an informed decision, we’ve compiled a list of 15 warning signs that you need to take seriously.

Warning signs to pay attention to:

1. Doesn’t really respond to his or her name.
2. Tends to repeat words and actions over and over.
3. Avoids eye contact.
4. Dislikes cuddles or being held.
5. Reacts quite unusually to everyday things like taste, tactile objects, smell, and sound.
6. Doesn’t like change, so introducing new foods, new environments. Prefers routine and structure.
7. Can’t relate to others.
8. Doesn’t take part in pretend play.
9. Struggles to understand emotions or feelings.
10. Delayed speech.
11. Prefers to be alone.
12. Shows little to no interest in objects.
13. Doesn’t point or look at objects.
14. Doesn’t recognise when being spoken to, but will respond to other sounds.
15. Struggles to express themselves.

Please remember some children can display some of the signs listed above, such as sensory children. But that doesn’t mean they are autistic. Autistic children also have personal differences, so your child might only have some of the signs, and not others.

It takes a team of medical professionals to diagnose autism accurately. If you think your child may be autistic, get in touch with your General Practitioner or Welwitschia Hospital (email: hello@welwitschiahospital.com) to book an appointment.

What may cause autism?

While we don’t know for sure what causes autism, we do believe that certain genetic and environmental factors increase the risk of having an autistic child. These include:

• Genes
• Taking certain prescription drugs during pregnancy
• Your age
• Having an autistic sibling
• Having fragile X syndrome or tuberous sclerosis

That’s why prenatal screenings and leading a healthy lifestyle during pregnancy are vital.

Some parents may also choose not to vaccinate their child for fear that this causes the onset of autism. Please be aware that there is absolutely no conclusive evidence that inoculations cause autism. This is a myth and should be disregarded when determining whether to vaccinate your child or not.

Why is early intervention essential?

Because, like most medical conditions, the earlier you identify it, the better your chance of understanding what you are dealing with and helping your child to overcome the challenges faced.

Research also shows that children with autism who are exposed to early intervention such as autism-appropriate education and support at crucial developmental stages had a higher chance of integrating into society as adults, living independently, acquiring jobs, and building meaningful relationships.

Essentially, early intervention can help to improve your little one’s overall development.

• They’re able to master essential social skills.
• They learn how to react appropriately in society.
• Their physical development improves more rapidly.
• They learn more easily.
• And there’s a marked improvement in their emotional intelligence.
• They get the support that they need to accept and love themselves as they are, rather than thinking something is wrong with them.

The benefit to parents is you are able to create an environment in which your child learns vital skills and thrives. Why? Because you’re prepared. You know what you’re dealing with, and you’re able to intervene and make a positive change to your child’s life early.

How early can you diagnose autism?

A team of medical professionals experienced in autism can confidently diagnose a child as early as 18 months. But as a parent, you should be monitoring your child’s progress monthly.

Don’t wait for your child to catch up with the developmental chart. Don’t rely on a teacher or friend to suggest that something might not be right. Get help. Take action now. The longer it takes for you to get your child assessed means a delay in improving their development, and giving them a real shot at a good life.

Early intervention ensures that autistic children are enriched, empowered, and equipped to function as happily and independently as possible. Every child needs a safe, accepting environment where they can flourish and develop according to their unique strengths, challenges, traits, and dreams. As soon as you establish that, you see wonderful development in even the most challenged child.

~ Steffi Albertyn, Occupational Therapist

What treatments are available for autism?

Treating autism, for many families, is a financial burden. Initially, it requires the guidance of a multi-disciplinary team, and this can be overwhelming for new parents. But understand that together, these specialists can equip your child with the skills they need to lead an independent and happy life one day.

Trips to the following specialists will soon become the norm:

• Occupational therapists
• Speech and language therapists
• Physiotherapists
• Neurologists
• Development paediatricians
• Behavioural psychologists
• Nutritionists

Focus on creating a personalised autism treatment plan

The goal of any treatment is to tackle your child’s unique array of challenges and needs. This means you’ll want to tailor their treatment plan. With the help of an expert team, you’ll want to figure out:

• What your autistic child’s most significant challenges are? You want to treat these first.
• How they learn best? Do they learn easier when doing, seeing, or listening? Then use this knowledge to fuel their growth.
• What do they enjoy? Can you use these activities to help boost your child’s developmental progress?
• What are their strengths and weaknesses? You want to build on the strengths and tackle those weaknesses early.

With time you may find they no longer need play-group therapy. Perhaps you have mastered their food sensitivities, and now you can pay greater attention to emotional issues and fine-motor skills. The key is to take it one day at a time. More importantly, make sure to celebrate each achievement, no matter how small they seem

Living with autism? Do these six things.

What we hope you will see is that autism is not a life sentence. You have a precious child who requires special attention now. But with the right treatment plan and help from experts, you and your little one can lead a wonderful, happy life.

One day you could be kissing your child goodbye as they head off to start their University journey.  The secret is to not limit your expectations of your child. With a brain that is different (not less), you can never know for sure what the future may hold. It is the parent and the supportive team’s responsibility to ensure that your child has the support, encouragement, and intervention that they require to fulfil their dreams and goals according to their unique abilities.

Here’s how you can positively affect your child’s development:

1. Become an expert in autism

Read as much as you can. Speak to autistic adults, they are the only real experts in the field of Autism. Speak to people with autistic children. Learn from professionals who have experience in this field.  Knowledge is power. It allows you to make informed decisions about your child’s health, education, and physical needs. The more you know, the better for you, your family, and your special needs child.

2. Know your child

Nobody knows a child better than their parents. Figure out what makes your little one happy and calm, but also what bothers them or triggers an emotional meltdown. You’ll want to identify what stresses or frightens your child and how to handle these situations positively. Because your reaction can alleviate or exacerbate their responses. By doing this you’ll become better at preventing difficult situations. You will also create an environment in which your child thrives.

3. Stop comparing and start enjoying your little one’s journey

As parents, we can’t help comparing our child to other children. But this will only cause you anxiety.  Stop focusing on what your child’s not achieving or their differences. Instead, love them for who they are. What are their quirks? What do they do that makes you laugh or brings you joy? Remember, your child is unique. Embrace their eccentricities.

4. Allow yourself to adjust

There’s always an adjustment period. You are allowed to feel overwhelmed and to grieve for the loss of your idea and dreams of a “normal” (neurotypical) child. But with time, you’ll get into a routine that works for your family. You will start to see all the wonderful strengths and attributes of your child, instead of only seeing their limitations. You’ll begin to look forward to your trips to occupational therapists, behavioural psychologists, and physiotherapists. Why? Because you’ll see how your child starts to develop and grow in ways you did not imagine, how they start feeling more confident and calm within their environment and bodies, you will find new perspectives on your situations and get to know and understand your child better, and this is exciting. Best of all, you will learn the tips and tricks to help your child to live a happy and healthy life.

5. Be kind to yourself

Raising an autistic child is challenging. There will be good days and bad days. At times you’ll feel overwhelmed and discouraged. That’s completely normal. Don’t beat yourself up about wishing it was easier. Own your feelings, and take care of yourself. You need your sleep. You need to exercise. And you need to eat healthily because you can’t attend to the complex needs of your little one if you’re sleep-deprived and an emotional wreck. They rely on you to be calm and a source of comfort. When you are out of control, they will lose control. So take care of yourself first.

6. Ask for help

Whether it’s from a friend, family member, or medical practitioner, ask for help or join an online support group. When you cannot cope anymore, when you think you are losing it, call a friend and ask them to give you two hours of their time. Take a nap. Go to the gym. Get your hair done. Go on a date with your partner. Do whatever you need to do, to feel more in control. And remember, it won’t always be this hard. Things will get better.

Can your autistic child lead a good life?

Absolutely. Many autistic children can lead independent, happy, and full lives, provided they get the care they need to get to this point. Early intervention ensures that a child can reach their full potential in this regard.

In the first three years of our life, our minds are more mouldable than ever. We can more easily teach our brains to learn healthy emotional and behavioural patterns, language, social skills, and overcome gross and fine motor dysfunctions.

Unfortunately, some severe cases might never achieve certain goals, such as learning to speak, or to become independent or to successfully engage with their surroundings. This is a particularly tough journey for parents to go through. But even the most severe cases can be assisted to live meaningful lives. With adaptations such as alternative communication devices, sensory adaptations to the environment and visual aids, your child can be assisted to achieve the optimal level of functioning that is possible within their framework.  

 Going through this journey with leading medical professionals ensures that you are better empowered, prepared and more able to cope with the demands of supporting your autistic child in the path that lies ahead of them.

When should you see a doctor?

Make the most of those first few precious months with your baby. Spend time with them. Learn their habits and keep track of how they are developing. You will quickly start to see if your baby is falling behind.

Most importantly, listen to your gut. Do not wait to seek help.

If you suspect that your child might need to be assessed for autism, contact your General Practitioner or Welwitschia Hospital (email: hello@welwitschiahospital.com) to book an appointment today. Our Specialists are here to help you and your child get the best care.